Thursday, August 29, 2013

The happiest I've ever been

Have you ever been so happy you could cry?
When we won the first place trophy for dance team in 8th grade, I cried. When I learned that I was editor-in-chief, I cried. When I talk on the phone with long-lost friends, I cry.
But today was different. Nothing particularly good happened. In fact, I had a day filled with frustration and stress. But after an encouraging meeting after school with my yearbook advisers [the two most amazing women you could possibly imagine] I went home elated. 
I finished up my homework and ran straight to my room to work on yearbook pages, a project that has been looming over my head since the summer. I turned on my newly perfected Spotify "happy" playlist, painted my nails with my all-time favorite color [Chinchilly, by Essie] and plugged in the twinkle lights in my room. I surrounded myself with beautiful design inspiration and got to work. My room was full of good music and pretty lights and yummy scents [I used my favorite Rosebud salve] and I was just perfectly content with my life, my work, and my frame of mind.
And I started to cry. I cried because I am so lucky to have such an amazing job. I cried because I imagined myself doing the same thing in a dorm room at my dream school a year from now. I cried because I have parents who will support me in anything I do in my life. I cried because my little sisters were so cute and kept visiting me and dancing to the music I was playing, even if they didn't like Joy Division and The Wombats. I cried because tomorrow I get to spend three hours aiding for the coolest English teacher in the world. I cried because my friends who are away at college haven't forgotten about me, and kept sending me pictures and videos of themselves. I cried because I was, for the first time in so long content with my life, my grades, my friends [or lack there of] and my choices. 
Some day, I recommend you just surround yourself with happy things and be productive in what you love best. For me, it was journalism. For you, maybe it's art or music or sports. Being so happy that you cry is the strangest, most emotional thing you'll experience in a while. My Spanish teacher told us today that she hates people who are always happy. But I can't help myself this year. I just feel so happy to finally be happy. 
xxx

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